As Christians How to Comfort Family When Someone Over Doses

Sympathy card in envelope on table with flowers

Signing a sympathy card isn't easy. Nosotros search for words. We wonder what would exist comforting to hear. We worry about maxim the incorrect matter…

But fifty-fifty though it's not easy, it is important to reach out in sympathy. Our words can't have away the pain of losing a loved one, but they can go a long way toward helping a grieving person feel loved and supported.

Y'all should know right up forepart that y'all won't observe the perfect thing to write here. However, you will find ideas from seasoned Hallmark writers for skillful, helpful and hopeful things to write in a sympathy bill of fare.

Nosotros hope our tips help you relax, write and share your heartfelt caring with someone who is going through a time of grief.

Sympathy Letters: What to Write in a Sympathy Card

  • Condolences
  • Appreciation
  • Offer to Help
  • Following Up
  • Sudden or Unexpected Death
  • When Someone Has Died by Suicide
  • When Yous Cannot Nourish the Memorial Service
  • Loss of Parent
  • Loss of Spouse or Partner
  • Loss of Child
  • Miscarriage
  • Loss of Pet
  • Sympathy Closings
  • What NOT to Write in a Sympathy Bill of fare
  • What to write in a sympathy card VIDEO

Condolences

There are many expert reasons for keeping your personal sympathy message short. It could be that the card has already expressed almost or all of what you lot wanted to say. Or perhaps you didn't know the deceased well, or at all. Whatever the reason, you tin absolutely be brief and still come beyond equally warm and caring.

Examples

  • "We are so deplorable for your loss."
  • "I'm going to miss her, too."
  • "I promise you lot feel surrounded by much love."
  • "Sharing in your sadness as y'all remember Juan."
  • "Sharing in your sadness as you remember Dan."
  • "Sending healing prayers and comforting hugs. I am so sorry for your loss."
  • "With deepest sympathy as you remember Robert."
  • "I was saddened to hear that your grandad passed away. My thoughts are with y'all and your family."
  • "Remembering your wonderful mother and wishing you comfort."
  • "It was truly a pleasure working with your father for 17 years. He volition be deeply missed."
  • "Thinking of you all every bit you celebrate your sibling's remarkable life."
  • "Thinking of you all equally you celebrate your grandmother's remarkable life."
  • "We are missing Anne along with you. With heartfelt sympathy,"
  • "Thinking of you and wishing you moments of peace and comfort every bit yous remember a friend who was so shut to you."
  • "Our family unit is keeping your family in our thoughts and prayers."
  • "Holding you close in my thoughts and hoping you are doing OK."
  • "Fifty-fifty though at that place is joy in the homegoing, at that place is sorrow in your loss. Thinking of you at this tender time."
  • "Te acompaño en estos momentos de gran tristeza."

Writing tip: If you knew the person who has passed simply not the surviving family member(s) to whom you're sending your card, information technology might exist helpful to mention your connection to their loved one (from school, through work, etc.).

Appreciation

Information technology can be a dandy comfort to a grieving person or family to hear that others idea highly of their loved i, besides. If yous knew and admired the loved one who has transitioned, be sure to let your recipient(due south) know.

Examples

  • "What an astonishing person and what a remarkable life. I feel and then lucky that I got to know him."
  • "What a proficient and generous man your begetter was. I thought his funeral service was a wonderful tribute to him and all he has washed for our community. He will exist missed."
  • "Your granddad believed in uplifting everyone in his circle. I was i of those people. And I am and then honored to have known him."
  • "Your mama was an amazing lady, and I experience privileged to have known her. I know y'all will miss her deeply. I'll exist keeping you in my thoughts and prayers."
  • "Jubilant the life of a good person and mourning their passing with you."
  • "Celebrating the life of a skilful man and mourning his passing with you."
  • "Your daughter touched then many lives for the good. I'thou grateful I had the gamble to know her equally both a colleague and a cherished friend."
  • "Your mother blessed and so many people with her religion and kindness. Praying that you'll find comfort in your memories of her and in the noesis that others are missing her, likewise."
  • "Our abuela told the states our stories, passed downwards traditions and held us together in love. We are so blessed to come up from her and to feel her dear from heaven."
  • "I accept the best memories of staying with Aunt Edie as a kid. I don't think I've told y'all this, simply starting when I was about 10, she would accept me to Becker's for ice cream cones…and let me bulldoze! Only Aunt Edie…I'm going to miss her fun-loving spirit then much."
  • "Nobody could tell a funny story similar your mom. Remember at your graduation political party—the story almost the vacuuming incident? My face up hurt for a full day subsequently from laughing so much. I'll always cherish those memories of fun times spent with her."
  • "Your mama was ever doing for people. A lot of people have been blessed by her kindness and hold her close in their hearts."
  • "Qué persona tan maravillosa y qué vida tan extraordinaria. Me alegra mucho el haberla conocido."

Writing tip: Need a more specific word than "proficient" to draw the deceased? Consider one of these: kindhearted, talented, admired, unforgettable, fun-loving, funny, wonderful, well-loved, lovely, sweetness, generous, ane-of-a-kind, one-in-a-1000000, honorable, respected, caring, hardworking, strong, energetic, happy.

Offer to Aid

If you're in a position to assist your recipient with arrangements, meals, housework, one thousand piece of work, childcare or something else, and then feel free to include an offering to do then as role of your message. Just be sure to follow upward and follow through.

Examples

  • "I know I can't brand your hurting go abroad, but I desire you to know I'one thousand hither with a shoulder or an ear or anything else you lot need."
  • "Thinking of your family with dear and wanting to aid out in any mode I can. I'll call to see when would be a adept night to bring over a meal."
  • "You've got so much on your mind and on your eye right now. We hope information technology will make ane less worry to know that Kevin and I will be taking care of the 1000 for as long as you demand."
  • "I know this must exist a very difficult and demanding time for you all. We are keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. If there is annihilation we can do—from walking Max to picking up your dry cleaning, please let us know."
  • "It'south so important to go your residuum. I'll take the kids for a couple of hours whenever you need fourth dimension to sit down quietly."
  • "Sé que no puedo desaparecer el dolor que estás sintiendo, pero aquí estoy para lo que necesites."

Writing tip: In full general, the more specific your offer of aid, the better. And no task is also pocket-sized.

Post-obit Upwards

When someone you lot know is grieving, y'all might want to offer ongoing messages of support in the weeks and months post-obit the loss of their loved 1. Y'all can ship these cards to note an occasion similar the loved one's altogether, a wedding anniversary, holidays or whatever other time when the grieving person may need actress support.

Examples

  • "It'due south been a while, merely I know that the hurt doesn't get abroad when the cards and casseroles do. I'm still here for y'all."
  • "Just wanted to allow you know we're remembering your mom on her birthday and sending lots of caring thoughts your way."
  • "I know Christmas won't exist the same without DeMarcus, but I hope it helps a fiddling to know that you're in my thoughts and prayers, especially through the holidays."
  • "Hard to believe it's been a year since we said skilful-farewell to Noah. Couldn't let this anniversary become by without letting y'all know that I'thou thinking of y'all."
  • "This Kwanzaa season, in that location is a new ancestor to honor. Thinking of y'all, your mother and your family as yous lite the kinara."
  • "Solo quería que supieras que sigo pensando en ti y en tu familia."

Writing tip: Y'all volition find some cards specific to sympathy follow-up, but yous might also cull to go with an encouragement or thinking-of-you carte, or a bare carte with a beautiful or lighthearted photo on the cover, depending on the tone you're going for.

Sudden or Unexpected Death

It'south never easy to lose someone we love. Only often, a loss that no ane saw coming tin can lead to complicated grief. This might be because of the deceased's young age or apparent good health or an blow or other tragic circumstances. Any the case, these kinds of losses telephone call for additional comfort, understanding and ongoing support.

Examples

  • Words Fail: "I'one thousand not certain what to say in the face of such a difficult loss. But desire you to know that I care about you lot, and I share in your sadness."
  • Acknowledging Unexpectedness: "We were surprised and saddened to hear about Mike'due south passing. He was such a good guy. We're going to miss him then much, likewise."
  • I'one thousand Sorry: "I'm deeply deplorable your family is experiencing the pain of a loss like this. My heart goes out to each of you."
  • This Is Especially Hard: "Nosotros never would have felt gear up to say good-bye to someone as special as Christina, only this timing feels particularly tough. Wishing your family condolement and strength for the days and weeks ahead. Nosotros'll exist praying for all of you."
  • Wishes/Prayers: "Keeping yous in my warmest thoughts as you navigate this difficult fourth dimension—and wishing you promise and healing when yous're ready."
  • I'm Hither for You lot: "Information technology'south going to take time to get through the shock of this loss. Simply want you to know nosotros'll exist here for you all the manner."
  • Ongoing Support: "Hey, I know it's been a couple of months since you lost Ernesto. Simply want you to know I oasis't forgotten. I'm still thinking most you. And I'm hither to help out, listen, whatever you need."
  • Cuando no encuentras las palabras adecuadas: "Ojalá supiera qué decirte ante esta pérdida tan inesperada… Pero lo que sí quiero que sepas es que lo siento mucho."

Pro Tip: If everything you try to write feels wrong or bad-mannered, then keep your bulletin brusk. The simple act of sending a card communicates caring—fifty-fifty if you but sign it "With deepest sympathy" followed by your name.

When Someone Has Died by Suicide

Losing a loved i to suicide is devastating, and the isolation that can result from others not knowing what to say or how to support has its ain sting. Making the effort to connect is an of import first stride. Offering your sincere condolences without questions and without judgment.

Examples

  • Loss of Shut Friend: "Trey was such a dear and loyal friend. He made an incredible touch on me and I will miss him so much. All my thoughts are with yous and your family unit."
  • Loss of Family Member of Close Friend: "Friend, there are no words for something as heartbreaking as this. I wish yous didn't have to know this pain. Telephone call me any time, mean solar day or night, and I'll exist checking in with you through the days and weeks to come."
  • Unintentional (e.g. overdose): "I know how difficult your sibling was struggling and how much your family has been through, and I'm so sorry this happened."
  • Armed forces/PTSD: "Your family has served this country with courage and honor. You lot have and then much to be proud of. I promise that tin can bring you some condolement in your heartache."
  • "It's not off-white that PTSD took someone who already gave and then much of himself/herself to others. It shouldn't exist this way. I hope that you lot feel surrounded past love and support every step of this journey."
  • Immature Person: "I'thousand nevertheless stunned nigh Ramesh. I can't imagine what such a loving family unit like yours is going through right now. Ramesh really shone his light when he was here. I loved that about him. He volition exist remembered and loved always."
  • LGBTQ: "Kai was 100% themselves, and I loved that nigh them. Their self-assuredness is something that will always inspire me even as I miss them so much. If you ever want to share memories and stories, I'm here."
  • En este momento tan difícil de entender.
  • Pérdida de un familiar o amigo: "No puedo imaginar lo que están sintiendo en este momento tan difícil de entender, pero espero que tú y tu familia encuentren paz y consuelo en los gratos recuerdos de su ser amado. Los acompaño en su dolor."

Writing Tips:Acknowledge that the topic of suicide is very sensitive, and the recipient may accept many complicated feelings. Information technology's of import non to share your opinions on suicide and instead be supportive of the person grieving and however they are experiencing grief.

Language Notation: In being empathetic toward people whose lives have been impacted by suicide, it is important to avert terms like "committing suicide," which tin evoke feelings of guilt and blame. Instead, say "died of suicide" or "died past suicide."

When You Cannot Attend the Memorial Service

It's a very human instinct to desire to offer condolences and support in person when someone has died. Nonetheless, for a variety of reasons—either your own circumstances or the family's need to forego or delay a memorial service—it may be impossible to practice then. In those cases, you may wish to say a little more in your written message.

Examples

  • Wish I Could Be With You: "I wish I could be there to honor your dad along with you lot. He was a great man."
  • Looking Ahead to a Memorial Afterward On: "I know Kara's memorial service won't happen for a few months all the same. Just didn't want to let that much fourth dimension go by without reaching out to tell you how saddened I am by her passing. She was such a sweetheart. She'll be securely missed."
  • This Is Hard: "It's hard to lose someone who meant so much to all of the states, and even harder that we can't all be together to say good-bye. We want you to know nosotros're with you in spirit—now and in the days and weeks alee."
  • I'thou Hither for You in Other Ways: "Even though I tin can't be there for Tom'southward service, just want you to know I'm here to drop food by, mow the backyard or anything else that comes upwardly."
  • Homegoing: "There is a celebration in heaven and a celebration in our hearts fifty-fifty though we can't be there to put our arms around y'all."
  • "Ojalá pudiera estar ahí contigo para honrar la memoria de tu papá. Fue un gran hombre."

Pro Tip: When yous can't be there to honor the deceased in person, y'all might also choose to make some kind of honoring gesture in addition to sending a sympathy bill of fare.

Loss of Parent

It's never easy to lose a parent. No thing how quondam we are, no affair how close or complicated the human relationship, it hits hard. And it calls for some special words of comfort. (Note: These message examples alternate references to mother and father but could work for either.)

Examples

  • Compliment: "Your male parent was such a wonderful man. I was lucky to know him."
  • She'll Always Be With Y'all: "Y'all'll ever remember how it felt to express mirth with her and be loved past her. I promise those memories will bring condolement in fourth dimension."
  • He Lives on in Y'all: "The lessons your dad taught you, the dear he gave, the way he cared for people…all those skilful things live on in you lot."
  • You Were a Comfort: "Yous were a joy to your mother all your life, and a huge condolement to her over these by few months. It'southward sad to lose her, but I hope you experience good about the manner you lot were there for her."
  • Miss Him Too: "Just wanted to say how much your father meant to me, and how much I miss him, likewise."
  • Loved Her Too: "Your mom was such a good friend. I loved her, too."
  • When Y'all Didn't Know Him: "I didn't take the run a risk to know your father, but I know he must accept been someone special to have raised a bully son like you."
  • This Is Hard: "It's and then hard saying adieu to your mom. My heart goes out to you right now."
  • He was a colonnade in our customs: "Your daddy was father, blood brother, uncle and wise elderberry to so many in our community. He was much of a man."
  • Share a Memory: "Nobody could match your dad for making people feel special. I'll always recollect being the smallest kid on the pee-wee baseball squad he coached, only feeling big, because he made me team captain."
  • Siempre estará contigo: "El amor infinito de tu mamá siempre permanecerá en tu corazón, y su recuerdo vivirá para siempre en nuestras memorias. Lo sentimos mucho."

Pro Tip: If you've lost a parent yourself, it'south fine to mention that, only take care not to brand your bulletin more about y'all and your experience. Keep the focus on sending comfort and support to the person yous're writing to, and don't assume y'all sympathize exactly how they experience.

Loss of Spouse or Partner

Someone who's merely lost their spouse or partner is both grieving and also facing a huge adjustment to their 24-hour interval-to-day living and sense of identity. Whether they've been sharing life for six years or lx years, it'south a shock to lose that feeling of togetherness in everything. Y'all might cull to acknowledge this in a straight or indirect mode in what you write.

Examples

  • Compliment the Relationship: "What the two of you shared was truly something special. You lot loved each other so well."
  • Compliment the Deceased: "Stephanie was one of the funniest, most vibrant people I've ever met. I'm so grateful I got to know her."
  • He'll E'er Be With You: "Someone who shared and so much of life with you volition forever be a function of y'all. Keeping yous in my prayers as you recollect your husband."
  • Take Care of Yourself: "I know the days and months ahead volition be a big aligning, and so please give yourself a lot of grace. Do whatever yous need to have care of you—and know I'm here for you, too."
  • I Believe in You: "I know information technology must feel similar this hurting volition never finish. But I believe in my centre that comfort will find you when you're set. I believe yous've got the forcefulness to come through. And in time, I hope you lot'll believe it, likewise."
  • Miss Her Also: "Linda was such a terrific colleague and friend. I miss her deeply."
  • Loved Him Too: "I promise it helps a trivial to hear how much Matt was loved by others, also—me, for 1."
  • When You Don't Know the Surviving Spouse/Partner: "Even though we haven't had the run a risk to meet in person, I feel like I know you from the glowing way Jim talked nigh you. It was easy to see how much he loved y'all."
  • This Is Hard: "Losing the one you love is and so hard. And so I'thou praying hard for you lot—for peace, for comfort, for whatever you need right at present."
  • Share a Retentiveness: "I was merely thinking almost Anne'south unforgettable dinner parties—peculiarly the i with the notorious lemon-bar incident. That was the best. And SHE was the all-time."
  • Share What's True: "He held you down and lifted you upwards in this world. I hope you can yet experience him and his love effectually yous."
  • Admiración hacia la pareja: "El amor que compartieron fue realmente especial. Deseo de todo corazón que su recuerdo te traiga tranquilidad y consuelo."

Writing Tip: For a surviving spouse who nonetheless has kids living it home, consider including them in your bulletin. You could mention them in your greeting ("Dear Ellen and Family" or "Honey Finn, Katie, and Joe"), in the body of your message, or both. Some other option would be to send a separate card to each of the kids.

Loss of Child

This is an especially tough one. Every parent wants so much to nurture, protect, and see their child grow up, but sadly, life doesn't always work out that way. When writing to someone who'south lost a kid, try to relax and remember that the gesture of reaching out will probably mean just equally much as the actual words you write.

Examples

  • Compliment: "Della was such a sweet girl. I wish she could take stayed with you, and with all of us, for and so much longer."
  • They'll Ever Exist a Part of You: "You lot'll always miss Alex, but they'll e'er be with you in the memories you lot go along, the stories your family unit tells, the laughter you lot share, and the love you all hold for them. May those good things help heal the hurt in fourth dimension."
  • I'm Sorry: "Then securely sorry you take to get through a heartbreak like this. Sharing in your sorrow and keeping your family in our most caring prayers."
  • Time Was Short/Love Was Big: "Fifty-fifty though Maddie was with us for too short a time, she filled the world around her with so much joy. And yous filled hers with so much love."
  • His Life Mattered: "Though nosotros only got to hold him for a piddling while, he brought us together and brought and so many smiles. Celebrating all the days that were brighter because he was hither."
  • Loved Her Too: "I promise there's some comfort in knowing how much nosotros loved Aya, too."
  • Miss Him Too: "Missing Henry correct forth with yous."
  • This Is Heartbreaking: "It just feels wrong that yous should have to say goodbye to your kid. Whatever you're feeling, delight know you're non alone. I'g just one of many who want to do whatever we can to back up you lot in the weeks and months to come."
  • Share a Memory: "Jamal was the start to be a friend to anybody who needed one. I was just remembering when our course got a new student this spring, and Jamal fabricated a betoken of sitting with him at lunch. He was a special child."
  • Siempre será parte de ti: "Tu hijo es una estrella en el cielo, y su luz iluminará siempre tu camino y tu corazón."

Writing Tip: You tin can arrange most of these message ideas for parents who have lost an adult son or girl. The heartbroken feeling that life isn't supposed to work like this will yet apply—and the need for caring, support, and prayers volition be similar, too.

Miscarriage

Miscarriage is the kind of loss that you lot may just know about if you're part of the mom's or couple's inner circle of family and friends. If that'due south the case, you accept a unique opportunity be a source of condolement and support in a world that doesn't know.

Examples

  • Your Loss Is Real: "The love you lot felt for your baby-to-be was real, and then is the loss you're experiencing. I hope you can be gentle with yourself and honor whatsoever you're feeling right now."
  • I'm Lamentable: "I'm so distressing you lot've had to let go of the dreams you were already cherishing for your baby."
  • This Is Difficult: "I tin can't brainstorm to sympathize all yous're feeling right now, simply I know information technology can't be easy. I wish you didn't accept to go through a loss like this."
  • Wish for Healing: "Keeping you and Keisha in my thoughts and hoping for healing to come to you in time."
  • I'm Hither for You: "I was deeply saddened to hear you've had a miscarriage. Just want y'all to know I'm here for you lot—to talk, to bring over a meal, or whatever you need right now."
  • It'south Not Your Fault: "Just wanted to remind yous that in that location was nothing you could or should have done differently. Sometimes these things just happen. I'g sorry it had to happen to you."
  • Lo siento: "Siento mucho la pérdida de tu bebé. Aquí estoy para ti, para hablar, para escucharte, para lo que necesites."

Writing Tip: Information technology'south sad for an expecting female parent to lose a pregnancy even when she already has children, or may go along to take others. And then avoid saying anything like "At to the lowest degree you lot already have Emma" or "You tin can e'er try over again." Those thoughts come up from a good place, just they risk implying that the mom or couple should simply become over it quickly and movement on.

Find more than messages and ways to support parents who have lost a baby.

Loss of Pet

Pets are genuinely family members for a lot of us, and when we lose one, it can be a huge comfort to accept others recognize how much they meant and how lamentable it is to say bye.

Examples

  • Compliment: "Benny was such a good dog. And so deplorable yous've had to say goodbye to him."
  • You Loved Her Well: "From your first hi, to your final goodbye, Shadow felt how much you loved her. She was 1 lucky kitty to accept you for her person."
  • Wish for Good Memories: "Wishing you smiles among the tears as you recall happy times with your loyal companion and friend."
  • She'll Always Be Office of You: "Trixie may be gone from your lap, but she'll stay in your centre forever."
  • Miss Him Likewise: "I was so sorry to hear near Speck. I sure am going to miss seeing him when I'grand out walking."
  • She Meant a Lot: "Our fur babies hold such an important place in our lives and our hearts. Thinking of you as you remember Gertie."
  • Share a Retention: "I'll never forget walking into your kitchen and finding every unmarried cabinet open up and Fluff peeking out from a drawer. He was such a clever cat."
  • "Lucas era united nations perro tan bueno y cariñoso. Siento mucho que hayas tenido que decirle adiós."

Pro Tip: If your recipient has had to make the hard decision to have their pet put to sleep, consider affirming them in that determination. Permit them know you back up their pick, that yous know it wasn't easy, that you lot share their sadness but are glad their friend isn't hurting anymore.

Sympathy Closings

A warm, respectful closing is a graceful way to wrap upward your sympathy message. Choose 1 of these, or create your own.

  • With sympathy,
  • With deepest sympathy,
  • With heartfelt sympathy,
  • With prayers and sympathy,
  • With sincere sympathy,
  • With warm thoughts and prayers,
  • With caring,
  • With love at this deplorable time,
  • In caring sympathy,
  • With you in sorrow,
  • Sharing your sadness,
  • Thinking of y'all,
  • Caring thoughts are with you,
  • God bless,
  • God bless y'all and comfort y'all,
  • Keeping you in our prayers,
  • Lifting you lot upward in prayer,
  • Praying for you,
  • Wishing you peace,
  • Wishing you healing,
  • My heart goes out to you,
  • Please have our condolences,
  • My sincere condolences,
  • Prayerfully,
  • Con el más sentido pésame,

What Not to Write in a Sympathy Menu

Here are a few thoughts and phrases to avert in sympathy cards, considering they hazard either minimizing the recipients' unique feelings of grief or actually making them feel worse.

Examples

  • "I know how you feel." We all experience and process grief differently.
  • "She was then young." No demand for a potentially painful reminder.
  • "What a terrible loss." Avoid habitation on the hurting or difficulty of the loss.
  • "You should…" Instead of communication, offer comfort and support.
  • "You will…" Steer clear of predictions nearly how their grief journeying will go.
  • "This happened for a reason." Even with the best intentions behind it, this idea risks assigning arraign for the death.
  • "Sé cómo te sientes." No es bueno asumir cómo se sienten las personas. Todos experimentamos el duelo de manera diferente.

Writing tip: If you lot're still worried about proverb the incorrect thing, then go on your bulletin very short. The simple act of sending the carte du jour lets your recipient know you care.

What to write in a sympathy menu VIDEO

Observe out the simple formula for crafting your ain sympathy message and become some existent life examples and watch-outs from Authentication Senior Writer Cat Hollyer.

  • Credits:
  • Additional contributions by Cat Hollyer, Linda Barnes, Allyson Cook and Suzanne Heins. Melvina Young, Megan Haave and Cindy Phillips.

Keely Chace is a Hallmark Master Writer who loves reading, running and spending time with her hubby and daughters. She shares writing tips in her "What to Write" series on Hallmark & Community.

hughes-jonesroadvine1969.blogspot.com

Source: https://ideas.hallmark.com/articles/sympathy-ideas/what-to-write-in-a-sympathy-card/

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